Myth 2: Beauty is Pain

...Beauty is Pain, relating to styling Black hair...

The truth is I use to believe this to be a fact since every hairstylist that had styled my hair in the past always styled it in an aggressive and painful manner. Sometimes, I'm unable to freely move my head in the first three days of my new do. When I tried to complain, I would be told to bare the pain because I was the one who wanted to look nice, and pulling my hair tightly was the only way they could make my hairstyle look nice. Some stylists would even blame me for having a tough, thick and unrelaxed new growth at the time my hair was relaxed. I can go on and on about my painful experiences with stylists who preferred to style freshly relaxed hair because it was easier and quicker to style.

I'm getting better styling my own hair with every practice and to add to that, my arms doesn't hurt ANYMORE!

Many black women have been a victim of bad hairstylists who claim to have many decades of professional experience in hair styling. I would like to emphasize that there is a sharp contrast between hair styling and hair handling (not sure if such a term exists). There are many hairdressers who are really good at styling hair but receive a failing grade on hair care and hair handling.

What's really sad is that many women would go back to the same bad hairdresser because She always keep their braids looking fresh. Even if it means sacrificing comfort for the first few days, taking some pain killers to help ease the pain or even loosing few hair strands along the way.

Curl formers on blown-out hair, 7 hours later

Well, let me tell you it's all plain nonsense! Your hair styling experience doesn't have to be painful or uncomfortable. If you find your hairstylist is pulling your hair too tight or is just too rough with your hair, DO NOT be shy to let her know and if she can't loosen up because that's the only technique she knows, then do not be afraid to walk away. Instead, go home and learn how to do simple styles yourself and in the mean time, try and find an open minded stylist to train on proper hair handling.  It's not a bad idea to have a stylist to go to every once in a while, because sometimes you need a good stylist to style certain hairstyles.

FYI, I have found that Liberian hair dressers do not style hair too tight, although they might be rough handling your hair. So I'll recommend sourcing out a Liberian hair braider around you.

First Afro of 2013

And for relaxed ladies out there, you don't have to burn your scalp each time before washing the relaxer off your head. Relaxers are formulated to straighten the hair in the first few minutes it is applied, so there's no need to leave it on your head longer than the recommended time. I will also recommend getting your hair relaxed professionally since you are dealing with a strong chemical. A relaxer shouldn't burn when it is professionally done and if it does, then you might need to change your hairstylist or inquire about the chemical used. I use to burn my scalp each time I relaxed my hair at home, but I knew then that beauty didn't have to be so painful, and so I decided to start paying the extra money to get a pain-free beauty experience.
Also, if you like to space out relaxing your hair like I use to and would like to braid your hair to stretch out the relaxer, i'll recommend making the hairstylist's job easier by doing a blow out on your roots and properly moisturizing it before going. I never use to do this and I regretted it each time. You can also follow some of the advice I talked about relating to natural hair.

So, there you have it ladies, there's absolutely no reason why you have to go through a painful experience each time you go get your hair done. And for any hair stylist reading this, educating yourself about Best Black Hair Care Practices would be beneficial to you and your clients, whether young or old.